Age

I had lunch yesterday with my longtime friend and former colleague John. John is nearly three years older than me and has two adult children, but no grandchildren. He had somehow forgotten that I became a grandfather in April. When I reminded him, he said "You realize this makes you older than me now."

I laughed, but it made me think about the life events that I associate with being "older." When I got married, I felt older than my contemporaries who were still single. When I became a father, I felt suddenly older than when we were childless. And looking in the mirror and thinking "grandpa" makes me feel way older than a year ago.

The next aging marker is when I retire. Then I'll be unemployed for the first time since college. Even though my brother who is seven years younger and his wife who is 10 years younger both retired several years ago, retirement seems like something old people do.

Yes, I know you're as young as you feel, and all of these life events are what you make of them. Plenty of people who get married get unmarried and stay that way without getting younger again. Once Rebecca was on her own and making her own cell phone and car insurance payments, I no longer felt the responsibility of parenthood, but I didn't feel younger again. And the grandpa frame is because when I was a child, my grandparents seemed impossibly old.

I'm glad I got to have these life passages. But John's comment resonated with me, and the fact that he said it meant he got it.